Today was an interesting day. I played fetch with Jubilee, Hanna, and Adam, Jubilee being the dog. Hanna, Adam and I all had separate sticks, so we’d make Jubilee run back whenever she came back with a stick. At first, I was playing with Hanna, and then Hanna decided to give the stick to Adam and told him not to Jubilee. When he saw Jubilee, he became running and screaming. Last year, Jubilee used to torture Adam a lot, so he’s frightened at the thought of being two feet near her. But, he was so adorable! Once in a while, I’d hear Adam yelling, “I have a stick!”, and the stupid kids thought it in a perverted way. When we had to go back to class, I tripped over a rug, since it was folded, and then Adam tripped. The stupid basketball team laughed at him! Aww!
Although, he has became quite annoying. He started doing this thing with folded paper where he flicks it and it makes a popping sound. It does get annoying whenever he’s behind me and it’s really quiet. But, I can never get mad at him.
As for Freddie, I don’t really know. I saw him crying one day, and I felt so bad. He looked so innocent, yet he’s not. I remembered in fifth grade he was crying, but then, he was small and powerless, like the rest of us. It does hurt seeing him another girl, but I’ll manage to get over it sometime, hopefully by Valentine’s Day.
As the weather gets colder each day, I feel as though everyone’s heart is growing colder. I feel as though no one wants me to be happy, sometimes not even my friends. It hurts, but sometimes, being alone feels good, too. When I’m alone, I can actually be myself without being criticized. People say not to care about what others think, and at first, you don’t but then people pressure you to change and become what you aren’t. My whole point to this is that all this motivation sometimes isn’t helpful.
Anyways, on another note, a happier note, Valentine’s Day is coming up. This is an important holiday in my school, and the Valentine’s Day Dance is even more important. Natalie’s going to be spending time with her boyfriend, Alex (I forgot how many times they were on-and-off.) and Freddie may be my friend now, but he’s going to be spending time with other girls. What am I going to do? Sit around with my buddies who I hang out with during dances, Jen and Justin. Sometimes, Justin forces me to go dance with Adam and him and Jen, but Jen and Justin leave, and then Adam’s occupied with doing the moonwalk. Perhaps I could sulk around with Jason, who keeps on getting dumped. Or not. Maybe I could offer to sell goodie bags outside the gym, when all the selling happens. But, Freddie sometimes sells stuff, so I’d rather not. Maybe I will be absent that day, but my parents won’t let me do that. I’d rather say it: Valentine’s Day’s going to be hell.
Feeling: Clueless
Listening To: We the Kings – All Again For You
